Today was one of those days... One of those days where it took everything in me to eat healthy and go to the gym. I struggled through work; Christmas cookies and candy were on every table in every single office and I was so busy I didn't even have time to catch my breath. And, to top if off, it was just one of those days where I felt like even though I was busy all day, nothing got accomplished. So, when it was finally time for me to head out, all I really wanted was to be lazy.
Even though I really just wanted to go home, do some cleaning and wrap the pile of presents in my living room, I decided to keep going straight, and not turn on my road when I was almost home. I drug myself into the gym, forced myself to get changed, and decided I was going to hit it hard even though I really didn't want to.
My five minute warm up dragged on forever, but when the timer on the stair stepper beeped at me, I walked to the free weights and decided to make it count. I pushed out my full workout, plus a little more, and even did a full abdominal workout after my lift. And I felt better. Still not 100%, but much better. And then, I pushed out my cardio - and felt even better.
Driving home I realized (yet again... I seem to be a bit stubborn on this sometimes) the gym is my happy place. If I can just get myself there, it will help make me feel better about my place in the world. Even when I don't initially want to go, as soon as I start my lift, the gym becomes my most favorite place in the world. I feel stronger, and more capable to take on whatever comes at me, and I walk away feeling a sense of accomplishment. The gym really is my sanctuary, and at this point, I couldn't give it up for anything.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
10 More Seconds
Finally, I have found the missing piece of my workout plan.... A great trainer! For the past year, one day a month, I have been working out with a trainer at Gold's Gym North. We would get together, run through the workouts she had written, and I would take them to do on my own for the following four weeks. To give her some credit, I gained some muscle and lost a little weight; and I felt and looked better than I had in a long time. But she never really motivated me. I took the workouts and went on my way - always having to stay on myself to keep up my schedule and heart rate.
Now, things have really changed. Last night was my second workout with my new trainer and he pushed me harder than I ever thought possible. Fifteen minutes in, I was beyond exhausted and my arms were burning. Twenty minutes in, I was sweating worse than the man next to me, and at twenty-five... well, I'm sure you get the point. So when it came to core for the last five minutes, I really wasn't sure if I'd even be able to hold up my body weight in plank position. But Ted pushed me to get in position, and then to make it even more difficult. "Flex your calves, your hamstrings, your quads, pull the bellybutton to the spine, bend your elbows just a little." OMG, by the third one I really thought I was going to fall on my face. But he kept saying, "ten more seconds....ten more seconds....ten more seconds," and I did just that. Ten more, and then ten more, and more and more... I made it a minute longer than I ever have before and I felt a sense of accomplishment that I haven't known in a very long time.
At the end of my workout, there was a puddle of sweat on my mat, my whole body was shaking, and I basically wanted to puke; but I felt fabulous! And, just for good measure, I made sure to go do my extra half hour of cardio on the treadmill and stair stepper.
Now, things have really changed. Last night was my second workout with my new trainer and he pushed me harder than I ever thought possible. Fifteen minutes in, I was beyond exhausted and my arms were burning. Twenty minutes in, I was sweating worse than the man next to me, and at twenty-five... well, I'm sure you get the point. So when it came to core for the last five minutes, I really wasn't sure if I'd even be able to hold up my body weight in plank position. But Ted pushed me to get in position, and then to make it even more difficult. "Flex your calves, your hamstrings, your quads, pull the bellybutton to the spine, bend your elbows just a little." OMG, by the third one I really thought I was going to fall on my face. But he kept saying, "ten more seconds....ten more seconds....ten more seconds," and I did just that. Ten more, and then ten more, and more and more... I made it a minute longer than I ever have before and I felt a sense of accomplishment that I haven't known in a very long time.
At the end of my workout, there was a puddle of sweat on my mat, my whole body was shaking, and I basically wanted to puke; but I felt fabulous! And, just for good measure, I made sure to go do my extra half hour of cardio on the treadmill and stair stepper.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Success - Comes with Small Steps
I haven't been blogging a whole lot lately, but thought I'd throw up my most recent progress. Because for me, it's huge. Over the past 6 weeks, I have buckled down on my diet and pushed my workouts a little bit harder. And believe it or not, it actually is providing me with results.
I am very proud to say, in six weeks, I have lost 10 pounds and 5% body fat! I had been stuck at my plateau for so long I was really starting to lose hope. That feeling prompted me to meet with a new trainer at the gym I occasionally use. He set my diet up and away I went. I also decided it was really time to find some peace with the treadmill and add a lot more running to my cardio mix. I tended to gravitate toward the stair stepper or elliptical and I knew the treadmill is what I really needed. So, with those two changes, I went on my way.
I have logged almost every day since October 27th - both food and exercise. And, when I went in to meet with the trainer again and set up my new schedule it was time to update the numbers. I knew the weight was dropping because I am addicted to the scale and have been religiously watching it move, but I was honestly flabbergasted at how much I dropped in my body fat percentage. And all I can think now is - I've got this; it's time to buckle down and knock it out of the park. So, we set some new goals...
In the next three months I will be meeting with my new trainer, Ted, twice a week (Tuesday & Thursday) for an intense full body workout. I will do a body pump class Monday nights (Ted instructs them at my gym), and will lift one additional day. I will make sure to get in good cardio (at least an hour) and abs the other two days, and make sure to include a rest day one day a week. If I can maintain my diet and continue to push myself to new levels at the gym, I really think my goals are attainable. For the first time in my entire life, I feel like I really can be fit and healthy (and look great in a tight pair of jeans). Talk about an amazing and uplifting feeling!
Goals: Drop 8 more pounds; Drop 5% additional body fat
** Reassess on March 3, 2010
I am very proud to say, in six weeks, I have lost 10 pounds and 5% body fat! I had been stuck at my plateau for so long I was really starting to lose hope. That feeling prompted me to meet with a new trainer at the gym I occasionally use. He set my diet up and away I went. I also decided it was really time to find some peace with the treadmill and add a lot more running to my cardio mix. I tended to gravitate toward the stair stepper or elliptical and I knew the treadmill is what I really needed. So, with those two changes, I went on my way.
I have logged almost every day since October 27th - both food and exercise. And, when I went in to meet with the trainer again and set up my new schedule it was time to update the numbers. I knew the weight was dropping because I am addicted to the scale and have been religiously watching it move, but I was honestly flabbergasted at how much I dropped in my body fat percentage. And all I can think now is - I've got this; it's time to buckle down and knock it out of the park. So, we set some new goals...
In the next three months I will be meeting with my new trainer, Ted, twice a week (Tuesday & Thursday) for an intense full body workout. I will do a body pump class Monday nights (Ted instructs them at my gym), and will lift one additional day. I will make sure to get in good cardio (at least an hour) and abs the other two days, and make sure to include a rest day one day a week. If I can maintain my diet and continue to push myself to new levels at the gym, I really think my goals are attainable. For the first time in my entire life, I feel like I really can be fit and healthy (and look great in a tight pair of jeans). Talk about an amazing and uplifting feeling!
Goals: Drop 8 more pounds; Drop 5% additional body fat
** Reassess on March 3, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
"You're So Skinny"
In the past three days I have heard this exact phrase directed at me twice: "You're so skinny." It's a great thing to hear, but really has forced me to take a step back and think about what they are saying.
"You're so skinny." Why in the world don't I see that...? I still deal with body issues every single day. I guess I just don't see the change anymore, and I question that phrase. I know I'm stronger, and healthier... but skinny? How can I be skinny when I still have some pudge around my middle, the bat wings are still there and I definitely still have some side-ass goin' on. In my wildest dreams "skinny" was never something I imagined someone saying about me. And, to top it off, I'm still 9-13 pounds (depending on the day) away from my goal weight. So now I wonder, what does "skinny" really look like.
My goal weight something I know I want, but it seems so out of reach. I have been sitting in the same place for a while now, and I know it is directly linked to my eating habits. But, I just can't seem to get to the place where I want to eat only healthy foods and not drink some wine on the weekends. I can't seem to find that place of discipline that I know I need to accomplish this last piece. I care enough to hit the gym regularly and work myself to exhaustion, but just can't seem to care about eating and drinking healthy as well. And, when I hear I'm "skinny" that discipline part of me really says, "F-it! Eat what you want." But, if I ever want to get to my initial goal weight, or drop my body fat to "athletic" ranges, I need to buckle down and find the strength to walk the walk completely, rather than putting in half the effort. With that being said, I need to find a way to say no to food. And, I know this is going to be my toughest battle yet.
With that being said - If anyone knows of any amazing cook books that are healthy, but still have good flavor recipes, I'd love some suggestions. I have to find a happy medium between taste, portion size and health. Ugh - Good luck to me!
"You're so skinny." Why in the world don't I see that...? I still deal with body issues every single day. I guess I just don't see the change anymore, and I question that phrase. I know I'm stronger, and healthier... but skinny? How can I be skinny when I still have some pudge around my middle, the bat wings are still there and I definitely still have some side-ass goin' on. In my wildest dreams "skinny" was never something I imagined someone saying about me. And, to top it off, I'm still 9-13 pounds (depending on the day) away from my goal weight. So now I wonder, what does "skinny" really look like.
My goal weight something I know I want, but it seems so out of reach. I have been sitting in the same place for a while now, and I know it is directly linked to my eating habits. But, I just can't seem to get to the place where I want to eat only healthy foods and not drink some wine on the weekends. I can't seem to find that place of discipline that I know I need to accomplish this last piece. I care enough to hit the gym regularly and work myself to exhaustion, but just can't seem to care about eating and drinking healthy as well. And, when I hear I'm "skinny" that discipline part of me really says, "F-it! Eat what you want." But, if I ever want to get to my initial goal weight, or drop my body fat to "athletic" ranges, I need to buckle down and find the strength to walk the walk completely, rather than putting in half the effort. With that being said, I need to find a way to say no to food. And, I know this is going to be my toughest battle yet.
With that being said - If anyone knows of any amazing cook books that are healthy, but still have good flavor recipes, I'd love some suggestions. I have to find a happy medium between taste, portion size and health. Ugh - Good luck to me!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Binging
I have an eating disorder, and it's called binge eating. I always knew it was in there, and came out to visit when something went wrong. But, I've recently noticed it comes out when everything is completely okay. As I sit back and think about it, something finally occurs to me. It's a HUGE, blinking neon sign that says - Quit being so fixated on what you can and can not eat!!! I tend to hit the diet so hard and so extreme, that I finally fizzle out; and the fizzle is more like a gigantic sonic boom of eating.
Through my whole life, I have been dedicated to doing everything right, even perfectly if possible. Obviously, I've created some stress fractures over time, and they are opening up wide in the form of eating whatever I can find. I can't keep doing this. I can't tell myself, "you can't have this," or, "you're not allowed." I have to allow myself a little flexibility if I ever intend to truly succeed.
In my first two years of college, I was the healthiest, and weighed less then I ever imagined possible, and in no way was I an extremest about my diet. I ate small meals throughout the course of the day, and had a little ice cream when I felt like it. I hit the gym just like I do now, but in all honesty, maybe a little less. And, I was in amazing condition. It's time to realize that's where I need to go. I don't need to starve myself on 1200 calories a day, and I don't need to completely pull myself off anything and everything that is 'bad' for me. I just need to relax a little, cheat (a little) when I need to, and move forward knowing I can have whatever I want, but I chose to listen to my body and eat only when I'm hungry. And when I'm hungry, only eat until I'm full. I can do this!
Through my whole life, I have been dedicated to doing everything right, even perfectly if possible. Obviously, I've created some stress fractures over time, and they are opening up wide in the form of eating whatever I can find. I can't keep doing this. I can't tell myself, "you can't have this," or, "you're not allowed." I have to allow myself a little flexibility if I ever intend to truly succeed.
In my first two years of college, I was the healthiest, and weighed less then I ever imagined possible, and in no way was I an extremest about my diet. I ate small meals throughout the course of the day, and had a little ice cream when I felt like it. I hit the gym just like I do now, but in all honesty, maybe a little less. And, I was in amazing condition. It's time to realize that's where I need to go. I don't need to starve myself on 1200 calories a day, and I don't need to completely pull myself off anything and everything that is 'bad' for me. I just need to relax a little, cheat (a little) when I need to, and move forward knowing I can have whatever I want, but I chose to listen to my body and eat only when I'm hungry. And when I'm hungry, only eat until I'm full. I can do this!
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Another Inch Off the Pants Size!
Although it's beyond hot outside, and the last thing I've wanted to do is hit the gym, I've continued to keep my schedule up and it is paying off. Though the weight still isn't falling off me like I want it to, I am continuing to tone up and lose inches where it counts. In fact, I bought new jeans over the weekend and they are another inch smaller! So, even though I'm not seeing it on the scale, at least I'm fitting into smaller clothes!
Tomorrow starts my first set of double days, so we'll see if any results come from the new schedule. I will be adding in two to three mornings a week thanks to my bestie signing up at my gym and being a major morning person (which I am not and need the encouragement). I will head in at 5:00 and get in 45 minutes to an hour of good cardio, and then will head back again after work to get in a full lift and abs session. Hopefully this is the little extra cardio I need to get myself the rest of the way to goal. We shall see.....
This weeks workouts:
Monday - Chest, tri's, core and 30 mins of cardio
Tuesday - Back, shoulders, core and 30 mins of cardio
Wednesday - Morning: Cardio 45-60 mins; Afternoon: Bi's, tri's, core and 30 mins of cardio
Thursday - Morning: Cardio 45-60 mins; Afternoon: Legs, core and 30 mins of cardio
Friday - Cardio (1 hour) and core
Saturday - Yoga
Sunday - Rest
Tomorrow starts my first set of double days, so we'll see if any results come from the new schedule. I will be adding in two to three mornings a week thanks to my bestie signing up at my gym and being a major morning person (which I am not and need the encouragement). I will head in at 5:00 and get in 45 minutes to an hour of good cardio, and then will head back again after work to get in a full lift and abs session. Hopefully this is the little extra cardio I need to get myself the rest of the way to goal. We shall see.....
This weeks workouts:
Monday - Chest, tri's, core and 30 mins of cardio
Tuesday - Back, shoulders, core and 30 mins of cardio
Wednesday - Morning: Cardio 45-60 mins; Afternoon: Bi's, tri's, core and 30 mins of cardio
Thursday - Morning: Cardio 45-60 mins; Afternoon: Legs, core and 30 mins of cardio
Friday - Cardio (1 hour) and core
Saturday - Yoga
Sunday - Rest
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Cleaning Amazement
Throughout my life, I've been one of those people that seems to go through spurts when it comes to keeping a clean house. Sometimes I'm all over it, and others, it looks like I live with a group of twenty-something frat boys. For a little over a month now, I've definitely stayed on the side of clean and tidy.
As I jumped off the couch to go clean the tub, I realized something... It's 8:45 at night, I worked all day, went to the gym, and am still completely okay getting off the couch to go scrub the tub. And, if I had to take a gander as to why I'm completely okay doing this, it's because I actually have the energy to do it. And... the reason for that is because I'm fit and active again!
In my past, every time I've been unhealthy, I was exhausted, lethargic and down right spent at the end of the day. After sitting around all day eating unhealthy food; I wanted to do nothing other than sit at home in front of the TV as soon as I got off work. Since I've gone back to healthy living, everything, including cleaning, is so much faster, easier, better.
Go figure... healthy life = more energy = clean home. Yes! Everything seems to finally be falling into place. It's amazing what some major life changes will really do (especially for my house).
As I jumped off the couch to go clean the tub, I realized something... It's 8:45 at night, I worked all day, went to the gym, and am still completely okay getting off the couch to go scrub the tub. And, if I had to take a gander as to why I'm completely okay doing this, it's because I actually have the energy to do it. And... the reason for that is because I'm fit and active again!
In my past, every time I've been unhealthy, I was exhausted, lethargic and down right spent at the end of the day. After sitting around all day eating unhealthy food; I wanted to do nothing other than sit at home in front of the TV as soon as I got off work. Since I've gone back to healthy living, everything, including cleaning, is so much faster, easier, better.
Go figure... healthy life = more energy = clean home. Yes! Everything seems to finally be falling into place. It's amazing what some major life changes will really do (especially for my house).
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